teenagers scare the living shit out of me.

So it appears that I never realized until today just how much of a suckup I am. o.o Seriously. My teacher wanted someone to sort through songs and reorder them, and I thought nothing of volunteering.

What the hell?

Where's my teenager gene?! The one that tells me when to shy away from work of any kind that doesn't involve sex or turning on my Zune! To play my emo music, of course. (ONLYMYMUSICUNDERSTANDSME.)

Sigh.

I guess I'm just a suckup. Or maybe I'll be all teenager-y when I'm in college, you know, being all independent and writer-y and whatnot.

...

Not gonna happen, because A) I hate alcohol and B) I hate smoking. Aren't those the teenager things? xD Shows how much I know, eh?

But in all seriousness, I don't know why I'm not more of a teenager. I know, Dad had something to do with it (he died when I was 13, for reference if you, dear reader, don't know), but I've been like this my whole life. Maybe I'm just a wuss. I mean, it's not like I don't want to party (HARD), or like I'm some crazy religious person, you know?

I'm a rare breed.

And only my music understands me!!

...

That seems like the perfect place to end my blog, but I actually have more to say, for once. (:

I finished another story! :D It's called "Gold E. Locks" and it's about... wait for it... Goldilocks. Yeah. Shocker, I know. I had to write it for Imaginative Writing, so it's technically not my own "fault" that I finished, but it's more writing then I've done in a really long time.

Speaking of. I think it's insulting, my calling myself a "writer" and not writing lately. So by tonight, I will have at least a one-shot written. :D And if I don't, so help me...

Speaking of tonight (wow, I jump topics often), I'm not going to dance. ): It makes me incredibly sad, being as it's my favorite classes tonight, but at least I'll have time to do all that writing. If only blog posts counted in my mental tally, because this is really rambly. :P

Eh. I think I'm done.

BYE. :D

maybe we won't be okay. but maybe we're tough, and we'll try anyway.

So I've decided. (: I'm going to do The Life of the Party for MY final, and A is going to do Take Me or Leave Me (with yours truly as Maureen) for hers. :D I'm excited! Now all I have to do is practice X a million. (:

I think I need a break from something. I just... I feel... done. Like, I want to do things, but I've lost my drive. This terrifies me. I want to get as much out of my teenage years as I can, and that includes dancing + writing + singing + acting! But I'm just not feeling it.

I'm going fly fishing this weekend. <3 It's just the thing I need, to forget about all the shit in my life that's going on at the moment. I'd get into it now, but I don't have the patience.

So I've fallen in love with the song Maybe (Next to Normal), from the musical Next to Normal. :D Damn, the mom can sing. <3 I envy her. xD

I'm such a fucking Broadway geek. And I've never been. YET. (: But what can I say? The music's the SHIT, and I have a lot of respect for people that can sing amazingly when they're LIVE. (re: NOT MILEY CYRUS.)

Bye, loves. (:

point me to the sky. it's my turn to fly.

Wow. Again, sorry with the lack of updating. ): I do have things to say, though. For once. :D

I finally read the synopsis of Wicked (the musical). It sounds amazing, and I'M SO EXCITED I MIGHT BE GOING!

Ditto to SPRING AWAKENING! I heard the song Mama Who Bore Me (it's frigging amazing, for the record ;D), and I fell in love. (: I read the synop today, and Mother might be taking me in May. So, fingers crossed for that. (:

I've narrowed down the ideas for my final. (: Right now, it stands at:

Definitely Doing (as in, any others would be additional):

Dancing with A for hers (extra credit for me)
Singing Take Me or Leave Me with A (extra credit for both of us), as Maureen. :D

Deciding:

Superboy and the Invisible Girl from Next to Normal
Mama Who Bore Me from Spring Awakening
The Life of the Party from The Wild Party

About that last one. If you haven't heard it, I really recommend it if you like good vocals. (: It's from a musical (obviously), but it sounds like it could be done outside of a musical. (:

Any opinions on which I should do would be greatly appreciated in the forms of comments. :D

That's all for now.

Ciaoo.

hate me today, hate me tomorrow.

Deleted post because of incessant, self-absorbed, bitchy rambling. :D

Please enjoy this picture of a boy and a dog praying in its place. :D

i'm racing, got to get away from you.

Oops. I always seem to forget about this blog. :P Weeell, I just got back from a party thing. It was my friend's sweet 16, so we went to an arcade and junk. Now, Leesh is the nicest person ever, at dance (where I met her). She's always polite and everything. But apparently, when not there, she's a mega bitch. She was horrible to her parentals, even though they were trying suuuper hard to make her happy.

Blah. Some people... I'm just glad to be gone.

On the flipside, I think I don't want to be an English teacher anymore. *gasp* I was at a fly fishing expo (yes, they exist), and this girl was talking about working outside, and I just... It made me really happy, thinking about it. It sounded amazing, and I ADORE being outside.

I don't feel like typing anymore. Ciao, all.

Jasmine

i'm weird 'cause i hate goodbyes.

Oh, my. I'm listening to the radio, and apparently, this little 7 year old boy, in California, called 911 when burglars burst into his house and threatened to kill his parents. He ran into the bathroom with his 6 year old sister, called 911, and started crying on the phone (obviously). He told the lady to bring 'lots of cops and soldiers 'cause they're gonna kill my parents'. She told him they were on the way, and to stay on the phone. And then they burst in, and he told them the cops were on the way, and they left.

I wish I was as brave as that little boy.

if i could take you away, pretend i was queen, what would you say?

I'm melancholy.
I'm annoying.
I'm obnoxious.
I'm untalented when it comes to piano.
I'm a dork.
I'm addicted to SoBe.
I'm not drinking pop.
I'm not all that lovable.
I'm smart.
I'm kind of concieted.

But you know what? I'm fucking talented, and I'm making something of myself, be it dancing or writing or whatever. Idgaf what assholes say.

(:

imperfect boys with their perfect ploys.

Whoo! No school today. (: I stayed up really late last night, till about five, then my friend woke me up at 10;45, and we're hanging out in about an hour. :D As long as I can find my flipflops, at least... And even if I can't. (: We're going to buy my mommy a birthday present, and then get ice cream. :D I'm really excited. I don't know, it just seems like I never get to hang out with people that I don't see all the time, and I like being able to just call people up and say "Wanna hang out?" I could do that at my old house, but not anymore. :P Stupid moving-ness.

I finally opened my second season of Gossip Girl. Sex, drugs, and scandal! My kinda TV show. (: But really, I adore it. I hated the books when I originally read them, but I recently got the first one, and I think I'll reread them. Spoiled Upper East Siders. Maybe I just like the actors, who knows?

I think I really needed this break. It's so much better, not having to go to school. Especially since I would have died at school today, with two hours of sleep. :P

Well, I'm off to find my flipflops and watch Gossip Girl, methinks.

Ciao. (:

Jasmine

everybody needs inspiration, everybody needs a song.

Yes, that's Miley Cyrus. (: I love her. No idea why... I really can't stand Hannah Montana, but she's pretty all right. (:

So today we went out to lunch, right? We went to McDonald's, and when we got back, we had to go back through the other doors, 'cause nobody was at our usual ones. See, sophomores (like myself) technically aren't allowed to go out to lunch, but I go out with seniors. And the lady at the front was all set to suspend me until Nicole, fast thinker is she, made up some bullshit about me waiting outside. I've never been more grateful. xD

Choir has been crazy. :P The teacher has taken it upon herself to make us fantabulous singers by our freaking concert, on Friday. We have 2 more classes. Cue the stress? I do believe. We sang our hearts out, but she didn't seem pleased. >< Please, just kill me now.

I turned in my short story today, about the critic. (: The guy who did my peer editing said he really liked it, which was a total boost for my confidence. xD He said he was going to dream about the guy tonight, he was so real. (: That made me smile so much, I can't even say. I love Marcus Brown, I must admit. (;

Tonight, I've got dance. :D More THRILLER! Yes. (: <3

Tomorrow, methinks I'm seeing Alice again. Which, you know, will be pretty freakin' sweet.

I think I'm going to look up dances on YouTube. Here's one for y'all:

Crazy little girl. (:

Freaky, no?

Toodles. (:

Jasmine

we're off to never, never land.

Wow. I know, I know. "Jasmine, you skipped TWO WHOLE days in your blog-every-day-for-a-month thing!" How horrid. However, I have an excuse, albiet a flimsy one. I couldn't use my computer; I asked, but every time I did, someone was downstairs. Do you know how awkward it is to be on anything but Facebook with your Mom right there? It's awkward, believe me.

So today I saw Alice in Wonderland. (: I adored it. I'm a HUGE Johnny Depp fan, and I adore Helena Bonham Carter and Anne Hathaway. (: I just recently read the book, and I thought the movie did the book great justice with the strangeness of Wonderland, as well as adding their own qualities that make it a wonderful Tim Burton movie. (: I thought the ending song being sung by Avril Lavigne wasn't the greatest choice, but I still loved the movie. (:

I don't know what else to say; my life isn't that interesting, even if I do have a blog to tell people otherwise. (; I think my back is messed up again, but Mom says I've just been "dancing wrong". Don't know how that's possible, but there you go.

Also, I only have 2.5 days of school next week. :D Victory! Monday, the last half of Wednesday, and Friday are all I have to go, which means I get to sleep in and be home alone! It sounds boring, but I really don't do well with school on a regular basis. :P

And finally, it's getting warmer. (: I'm thinking March is going to end all the awful weather we've been having. Here's hoping!

Toodles!

Jasmine

If I just lay here, would you lie with me?

Well. Today was interesting, I suppose. (I've, once again, only got around 10 minutes. Gasp!)

I passed my Algebra test, I know I did. And in Choir, we had to sit SATB, one next to the other, rather then in our groups. xD The Alto next to me could NOT sing. Twas fantastic.

I'm drinking my second coffee of the day. (: I woke up at 6 am to go to McDonald's, and I'm quite glad I did. I adore coffee.

Whoo. Coffee.

And that's all for now. ): It's short, but what can you do?

Ciao.

Jasmine

hey, soul sister, i don't wanna miss a single thing you do.

Well, this entry's going to be rather short. I'm short on time, as I just got back from an unscheduled Dance Company meeting. It was super easy, just ridiculously fast...

Anyway. Yesterday, as I said, I was sick. :P So I went for a walk, with my Zune playing "Back Where We Started". Over and over. (: I walked all around my neighborhood... I've never, before now, noticed just how eerie it is to be walking outside with nobody there. o.o Somewhat terrifying, so I turned it low and pretended to be texting. xD I'm such a dork. (:

In writing news, I'm steadily working on editing my novel. (: I think it should be done by around the middle of March. Or, at least, Draft 3 will. Then, I can send it in to get my CreateSpace copy! :D I'm so excited.

In sad news, I failed a Chemistry test today. ): At least, I think I did. I'm hoping I got at least a C-, so I won't be in trouble, but I doubt it. Blah. At least today was a Late Start day. :D That means that instead of getting up at 6 30, I got up at 8! It was pure loveliness. :D

I'm currently reading On Writing, by Stephen King. (Did I already mention that? Probably... Ah, well.) I like it, it's very informative and also, I'm a huge SK fan. Pretty fantabulous.

Well, I have to run for dance at my studio. I get to be a Charlie's Angel! Hell, yes. *practices spy moves*

Later, all. (:

Jasmine

it's close to midnight. something evil's lurking in the dark.

I know, I know. "Thriller, Jasmine? Why would you do lyrics from Thriller, of all things?

Well, random (slightly rude) Internet person, because, as you may know, I am a dancer. This year, in "honor" of Michael Jackson's death, we're doing Thriller. And I get to be Zombiefied, in a sense. (:

I'm running from two zombies, and then I turn around and (le gasp!) six more are coming at me! So I run back at the two, away from them, and they catch me and throw me into the pile of zombies. (: Then they almost dropped me once, but I didn't die, so it's all good. (; I did cover my eyes, which made everyone laugh at me, but you know. I didn't want to see it if I was falling! o.o

In other news... I'm quite sick today. :P I was nearly throwing up last night, and now I haven't been able to eat anything yet. (Which is rare for me: I eat a lot, usually. It's something I need to stop.) I want to eat, but I know I'll just puke it up. :P

Sorry for the somewhat graphic image...

Lastly, before I leave you all...

I realized something last night, in dance. I h ave friends there that I've known for years, since I was four years old. I'm now 15--that's a heluva long time. We've always been very close, and we've always been one of the generations to want to be dancers when we 'grow up'.

But I was listening to Jess talk about college, and how she's going to major in that, and all I could think was "I don't want to". Yes, I adore dance. But I can't see myself ever doing as a career--there would just be too many problems, not the least of which being that I'd forever mourn not choosing writing.

I want to be an author. I don't care if I never become famous (though I'd love to). I want to write, and I'm going to be published one day. At 15, I've been told that I have talent. If I keep writing, then I can get better. I write, all the time. I can't see myself as a dancer.

And that makes me sad. ):

But, you know, I'll never stop dancing. 11 years is far too long of a commitment to ever stop. (;

Lastly (promise, this is the last bit), I'm thinking of going vegetarian. Any thoughts?



Ciao.

Jasmine

why don't we just leave it at that?

WHOO!

It's March 1st. You know what that means? Well, I'll tell you. :D

Okay, enough of the faux-cheerful-announcer thing. Anyway. It means that NaNoEdMo is officially underway. (: Which also means that there will be many more posts in fits of exasperation. Ah, it makes me miss NaNo.(:

For those of you who don't know what NaNoEdMo is, then I'm the gal to tell you all about it. (: It's National Novel Editing Month, a lot like NaNoWriMo, where you try to do 50 hours of editing in a month. It's great fun, except for when it isn't. But those times can't be helped. (;

Currently, I have three chapters edited, and I'm ready to scrap the rest of it and kill my FMC. But alas, stupid delete button is subconsciously not allowing me to. (:

I think I'm going to go now. But, for the record, I'm going to try to update this thing every day in March. (: Like the thing in February, only March. Ya got me? (;

Also, follow me on twitter. (Shameless promotion at its finest). I'm @misslilypotter.

That's all for now. Ciao, cyberpeeps.

Jasmine